I love you Father of mine where ever you may be.


Today as I sit home from work due to my injury, the doctor said I can lift two pounds up to ten times an hour. What a restriction, as a carpenter the hammer I have alone is a pound not to mention the materials are heavy. I accept and understand that I need to heal and doing my normal routine will not allow that.

I reflect on that acceptance and realize the most harmful energy in my life is that of my childhood and the man I know as my Father. It is almost surreal the feelings I have as I share these thoughts. My father left when I was seven or so. He and my mother got divorced and I never saw or heard from him again.

I spent many years trying to understand and believe that he loved me and my siblings. It was a very painful feeling my whole life that he had abandoned us. I know he did what he had to do; today I truly accept and forgive.

I would if given the opportunity and could talk with him have only a few words to say. The first is I am sorry for the years of pain we endured. I would then say I forgive him. Then I would hug him and say I love him. The past is finally gone I have from my heart forgiven and love the man who shaped my life in such a painful way. I know he did his best and I must do mine, I love you father of mine wherever you are. Thank you for the love and the lessons.

. We all have many painful memories; I hope we can all find the love at the end of the day. Forgiveness and love are the keys to healing; it is better when you can share that with the ones that the memories are shared with. I have no way of finding my father and no way to share my feelings with him. So I share with the world my love and forgiveness in hopes that he may feel my heart and soul bringing peace to his own.

I thank you for allowing me to share some thoughts and perhaps a smile. I am grateful for the many that take time to share and read my words and my heart. I hope we can all share a smile and some love being the change positive and helping pour world become a better place for all that we share it with.

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2 thoughts on “I love you Father of mine where ever you may be.

  1. My parents divorced but I still feel my father abandoned us. He remarried, had another child and seemingly forgot about my sister and I. I admire your ability to love and forgive your father. I still can’t seem to find it in my heart to forgive mine, or even find a reason. Perhaps someday I will. You have a gift for writing; inspirational. Thank you for that.

    • I share what I share in hopes of helping another love who they are as I help love myself and all that care to hear what i would share. I would and do pray for peace in your heart. The damage done in my life from my own neglect and almost abandonment of my soul has given me a gift that I am compelled top share. I know its hard to forgive and accept some of the things that people do. Yet it is far worse what we do to ourselves wondering and thinking the worst, it brings darkness to our own souls. 48 and I spent more than 40 of those years torturing my soul with guilt, anger, and pain. I walked around like a bull in a china shop a real macho asshole hurting many who crossed my path and costing me the things I held dear. I encourage you to not go down the road of unforgiven… Thank you for giving me a smile actually many today. I am grateful and honored that you took the time to share your thoughts and your heart.

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